Is This A Matter Of "Jatidiri"?

Assalamualaikum.. It's been a few days since my last post.. I was doing a lot of thinking these days around, trying to clean up all the messes in my life, in my head.. Hey hey.. But I'm still Cahaya Yang Riang Gembira.. =)

Kredit to Basistka.deviantart.com

A girl..

Who lives life freely..

Who lives life happily..

Who lives life proudly..

A girl..

With too much of talking..

With too much of writing..

With too much of smiling..

With too much of everything..

She.. Who leads a life thinking that all the "too much" things will make people in her life happy.. But..

People.. May like her.. May not like her..

People.. May think she brightens their day.. May think she is just annoying..

People.. May praise her.. May talk behind her back..

A girl..

Now she will talk no more..

Now she will write no more..

Now she will smile no more..

Now.. Too little of everything..

And so.. Here she is.. She's trying..

From too much of everything..

To too little of everything..

* * * * * * * * * *

Tiba-tiba satu suara yang entah datang dari mana lantang melontar kata..

"Heyyy.. Kamu adalah kamu.. Aku suka kamu sebab diri kamu.. Kalau orang suka kamu sebab diri kamu, kamu sepatutnya lebih sukakan diri kamu kerana diri kamu.. Dan please.. Tolong jangan berubah.."

Kadang kita sampai pada satu jalan buntu.. Yang mana pilihannya hanya satu.. Kekalkan rasa suka orang-orang yang suka pada kita ATAU ubah rasa tak suka orang-orang yang tak suka pada kita jadi suka? DAN.. DAN.. DAN di mana pengakhirannya cuma boleh ada satu saja.. Either this group of people will like you and the other group are not.. Or vice versa.. It has to be one or another..

If it's me.. I choose to be me, my true self, whom people like me as who I am.. I won't choose to change and to be another me, just to make people like me.. Let them be, let them like me, love me, or even hate me.. As far as I'm concern, I'll always be here whenever you need me..

And there are also people out there, who dare to change themselves and be a totally new person, just to make others like them.. In the end, it's all up to us.. The path of life is in our hand, and we decide to choose which path are we going to take.. It's all about the journey and not the destination.. =)

Assalamualaikum..

FOOT NOTE: There were once or twice, at some point of my life, where I want to change myself and becoming someone who is so not me.. Huh.. But now.. Aku cuma nak kata.. Aku banyak cakap.. Aku banyak tulis.. Aku banyak senyum.. Like seriously memang banyak.. Jadi, boleh ke tak boleh terima aku seadanya aku? Tak boleh sudah!!! Kalau boleh lagi bagus.. Ngee.. *nada berbaur blackmailing.. Haha..*

P/S: Entry ini bukan dalam konteks perangai yang buruk atau jahat yang sememangnya, totally takkan disukai.. Tapi lebih kepada sikap diri kita yang orang suka tapi ada segelintir yang tak suka.. So, basically, kalau memang dah sikap kita jahat, berubah itu memang perlu.. Tapi dalam konteks entry ini, ianya bukan sifat jahat dan perangai buruk..