Writing Is A Struggle Against Silence

-
Assalamualaikum.

Yesterday, while browsing through my blog stats, I found a referral to my blog. From a friend's blog, a really really old blogger friend of mine, knew him way back since 2009. An entry he wrote on DON'T JUDGE BLOGGER BY HIS OR HER BLOG. That was the first time that I met him after a year of being friend through social networks.

The way that he wrote about me, that's just me. That is just so Farhana. You can say that he did a good job on describing me, and as well as comparing a real life me and a virtual life me. I'm good in writing, way better than talking and bonding with people. And hence, I'm using that ability of mine to get near people. Moreover I'm a blogger and that's a plus point for me. I'm sort of knowing the way and know how to write and bonding with people through writing. But I'm failed if you ask me to be friend with a stranger by talking and seeing eye to eye with him / her. My mouth got sealed and my eyes will be everywhere. Eyeing this and that. You got a one sentence answer from a one sentence question. That is just me when I'm with someone that I met for the first time. Even though we are really close in social network. Seriously.


It's not that I'm not friendly and the silence type one. I got really hyped up, talking and laughing and making jokes with my closest friends and family. But I do keep silence on certain things. I love to express things, but in writing and not through words that we speak. Sometimes I wonder at what point in my life that this way of expressing myself got change and how it changes the way I used to be. 

Cause as far as I can remember, when I'm around the age of 7 to 18 years old, I'm good at both. I can write letters to bunch of pen pals all over Malaysia. Socializing through meeting people during a course or camp. I love to talk and talk and talk on a stage in front thousands of people. I'm so interested in writing poems and recite it during assembly time. That's how I used to be. But, after reaching 20 and above, everything takes a turn. A big turn.


It's not that I don't like the person I am now. I've adapted to it. As I grow too much into keeping silence, I learn to express my silence through words. Even though it is really hard and difficult. Believe me, it is. It's different when you compare expressing through speaking and expressing through writing. While you can easily expressing things if you speak, it takes quite some time for people to realize and understand the things you express through writing. You need to keep writing and writing for your expression to be heard just as loud as you speak.

Just like me. I'm writing and struggling against silence. But still, my feelings can't be heard. I'm too coward to speak, so I write. I write it here and there, but still it yields nothing. It's not that I'm hoping big but I still bear that tiny little hope, that what I wrote will be heard. If not today, maybe tomorrow, or maybe 10 years later. It's okay. As long as you can hear my voice, through each and every words that I wrote.

Assalamualaikum.




Ulasan

Unknown berkata…
eh...sama la..dulu suka ckp bnyak...skunk rase better silence myself..
12 September 2013 pada 5:54 PTG
Catat Ulasan

Catatan popular daripada blog ini

MRI Oh MRI : Pengalaman 30 Minit Di Dalam Gua Magnet

-
Imej
Assalamualaikum. Okay, first of all, pictures attached in this post are taken from Google, credit to the respected site. Atas sebab tidak mahu blog ini terus tercungap-cungap, ibarat nyawa-nyawa ikan sebab jarang ada post baru, jadi aku ambil keputusan untuk kongsikan pengalaman menjalani MRI di Hospital Melaka pada hari ini, 1 Julai 2013. Temujanji aku adalah pada pukul 2 petang tapi dah menjadi kebiasaan untuk aku datang lebih awal 10 minit untuk apa juga temujanji. Prinsip yang terbaik kita pegang, biar kita tunggu orang, jangan orang tunggu kita. Berdebar tak usah dikatalah, sepanjang jalan menuju ke MRI suite memang hati berdebar memanjang. Setelah selesai pendaftaran, aku diberikan baju hospital untuk ditukar. Segala macam peralatan besi yang ada pada badan perlulah ditanggal kerana seperti yang aku tulis di atas, ianya adalah gua MAGNET. Sebelum menjalani MRI juga ada checklist yang perlu ditanya kepada pesakit contohnya seperti pernah menjalani pembedahan memas...
Baca lagi

Parut? Tona Kulit Muka Tidak Sekata? Pigmentasi? Ini Jawapan Saya.

-
Imej
UPDATE TERBARU DIRI PENULIS : Sekarang dah berhenti pemakaian segala macam produk muka. Mulakan kembali dari bawah. Penjagaan dari dalam. Aku ambil Set Kurus Shaklee dan Set Penjagaan Kulit. Saja-sajalah nak cuba. Collagen Shaklee, ESP dan GLA Complex. Alhamdulillah tak sangka ada perubahan besar. Patut pun ramai yang jatuh cinta dengan Shaklee. Penjagaan dalaman dah ada, untuk luaran aku cuma pakai pencuci muka yang direcommend dermatologist, Cetaphil. Sesuai untuk semua jenis kulit. Kalau nak lebih berkesan, ambil bersama antibiotik untuk kulit selama sebulan. InsyaALLAH akan terasa kesannya. Jika ada kelapangan nanti, aku akan kongsikan tentang penjagaan kulit luar dan dalam ini berserta dengan gambar. Pada yang berminat nak tahu, boleh sms atau whatsapp saja. InsyaALLAH, ada kesempatan aku boleh balas. :) [Kulit setiap dari kita adalah berbeza. Jadi lain orang lain kesannya.] *All pictures are taken from Google. Credited to their respected site* Assalamualaikum. ...
Baca lagi

Ingat Lagi Pada Lirik Raikan Cinta?

-
Imej
Borak bersama bapak tersayang tempoh hari menimbulkan kembali sejarah-sejarah entry yang lama.. Entry tentang penterjemahan lirik Raikan Cinta yang sensasi dan kontroversi itu.. Hahaha.. Masihkah anda ingat? Seriously aku tak tahu makna sebenar di sebalik lirik itu.. Sebab M. Nasir tak pernah calling aku pun inform pasal itu.. Haha.. Ada orang kata, SILENCE IS GOLDEN.. Tapi aku ini, memang suka bercakap.. Suka berkata-kata.. Aku suka pada perkataan.. Semenjak berjinak-jinak dalam dunia puisi, sajak, pantun di bangku sekolah, aku begitu mencintai patah perkataan.. Bagi aku, kata-kata bukan hanya sekadar satu ungkapan tapi satu bentuk ekspresi perasaan, luahan rasa jauh dari sudut hati yang kadang-kadang tak dapat kita suratkan.. Hanya mampu kita siratkan.. Dengan perkataan.. Sebab itu, kalau aku berkata-kata, aku benar-benar maksudkannya.. ( kecuali kalau aku bergurau ) Aku cinta padamu? Masih menanti untuk mengungkapkannya.. Sebab itulah dalam sesebuah lagu, aku terpaut pada liriknya d...
Baca lagi